Tuesday, May 8, 2012

I Judge You

I come from a past full of money troubles. My parents both worked 40+ hour weeks just to keep food on the table and pay the "mortgage" on a 2 bedroom trailer to house myself and my four little brothers. We always struggled with finances. My parents had to file bankruptcy twice when I was a kid. We lost numerous cars to the banks and, at times, didn't know what we were going to be eating. I'm not saying we ever starved but we were never sure what was going to be on the table. Most of our food came from the Bishop's Storehouse which isn't necessarily a bad thing but I'll be honest and say I would have rather eaten spam, which we ate a lot of, at times rather than eat what we got from the storehouse. Bills were often paid by outside entities. When Christmas rolled around none of us expected anything to be under the tree. There always seemed to be something there but we're weren't anticipating anything. Living as I do now, not needing a job and enjoying the finer things in life, I always wonder how we managed to get by.

This is where the judging comes in.

I hear of people struggling with finances, who go shopping nearly everyday for frivolous things, and wonder why the heck they're spending their money, on t-shirts and makeup, when they should be saving for the rainy day they know is around the corner. Do they really need to make that vanity purchase when they live with their parents, don't have a car, and are constantly complaining about not having money, their own place, or a car?

This isn't just something I do with people I don't know. It happens, most often, with my own family members. I have family that attends every event possible in town and then wonders why they can't afford some of their bills. They give their kids allowances and buy them useless junk and then stress about paying the water, or electric, bill.

Why is it that I worry what OTHER people are doing with their money? It's none of my business. The worst part is that it becomes more than worry at times. I complain about it to other people acting like I have something to do with it and they should listen to me because apparently I think I know everything when it comes to money management. I don't. I never have. Why does this plague my thoughts?

I realize this is probably the stupidest, snootiest post, you've ever read but this is something I'm trying to get over and I'm just not sure how to do it. Am I the only one that does this? Am I the only one complaining about what OTHER people do with THEIR money? 


  1. Nope, you're not the only one who does it. I get equally perplexed about people who constantly complain about having no money but seem to go shopping every day.

    I mean, *I* complain about having no money, but I've been shopping for clothes once all year, and that was after my birthday a couple of weeks ago when I had money from my parents and my grandmother to spend and was in desperate need of new clothes!

    Anyway. No, you're not the only one.

    1. People always tell me that because my husband makes more money I have nothing to worry about. They never realize that having more money doesn't solve all of your problems.

      At the end of the month we have just enough for emergency gas and grocery and that's without going shopping, at all, for anything unnecessary. Money doesn't solve everything.

      I'm so glad I'm not alone. I figured I wasn't but sometimes I feel like such an ass for thinking these things.

  2. Nope you are not the only one...I often see people make crazy purchases ~ always wanting more ~ then they complain because they have to pay a late charge on a bill, OR they announce HOW could they send me to collections!
    I think what bothers me even more, is when someone says "Oh I wish I could be more like you", you have it so easy! Maybe now I don't have to worry, BUT have worked hard to get to this place.
    Money is evil, and know that it is none of my business what other people do with their money, but please stop complaining to me about not having money and PLEASE don't make me feel guilty for what I do with my money~

  3. It's all about prioritizng and saying no. Most can't do that anymore. You aren't the only one who thinks these things. People are too afraid to offend someone so they don't speak up against the insanity.
    I'm like Tammy: people think I have it so easy because I have money. I don't have money--I plan ahead so I can cover what I need and save when I can. I work hard to do this.
    One thing, though. Money isn't what's evil. It's just a tool. The problem is lack of personal responsibility.

  4. i've been all over the map with money, from being the poorest of poor, to being pretty comfortable. those vanity purchases i made when i was living with my parents and had no other bills was #1, because i'd never been taught how to save and use my money properly, and #2 because i was depressed and needed to fill the void with something. you know? sometimes people just don't know any better (or don't want to know any better...)